I Sit On You, Lint Licker!

From the phenomenally hilarious to the udderly strange...

Babs and Mr. A-OK (Ryan) may not know it, but they had the recent chance to get me hooked on a new guilty pleasure, Tim and Eric Awesome Show, Great Job! This show is just too strange for words, with various short skits featuring animation and live action stars (including John C. Reilly, David Cross, Bob Odenkirk, and Will Forte).

So today, I lead with one of the strangest bits I've seen on the show:

Now on to the ad game, and the one that's been sticking out in EVERYBODY'S minds (and vocabulary) lately (this one is SFW, although the tone may not indicate it). Here is the extended version:

Seriously - not a day goes by lately that I don't hear somebody referred to as a "Lint Licker" or a "Cootie Queen!"

I leave you today with what is probably the best (read: "funniest," NSFW) bit in this post (one that had me laughing harder the longer it went on) - a video brought to us by Sr. Mario J.:

"Who designed this fucking level?!"

Seriously - I'm crying!!

Until next time, true believers - Stay Dirty (and or Awkward)!

-El Capitán

Revenge, Soap, and Milkshakes

It takes something like this to get me back into the blogospheres...

(Let me preface this by saying that the videos below are worth EVERY second of your time - you WILL NOT laugh harder for quite some time - or at least the next 10 minutes.)

As I've blogged about before, Jimmy Kimmel and Matt Damon have had a little "feud," shall we say, going on over the years. Matt has been invited as a guest on Jimmy Kimmel Live countless times over the past few years, only to be shuffled off stage as Jimmy conveniently "runs out of time..."

So a little while back, Jimmy's girlfriend, Sarah Silverman, presented Jimmy with a music video she had produced just for him, to let him in on a little something that had been going on in her personal life. Here's that video (as sent to me by Sammy, Ariel, Heather, my mom, and several others):

"She's f*cking Matt Damon!"

Fast forward to last night... Jimmy took the opportunity of a lifetime - his cushy post-Oscar telecast - to deliver a little revenge. And as we all know from the Klingon proverb, "Revenge is a dish best served cold." Here's Jimmy's video retaliation (fucking CLASSIC!):

"He's f*cking Ben Affleck!"

Seriously - that one is like a who's-who of A-listers, right? Like a We Are The World for Gen-Y!

Before I leave you with that, I've got a few other thoughts that have come across my scattered brain lately:

Did you know that there's a difference between a Lotion Dispenser and a Soap Dispenser?

Neither did I - until I had a strange visit to Bed, Bath, and Beyond recently. Part of decorating my new house has been the accessorizing of the bathrooms. I bought a nice looking (and still masculine) set for my bathroom, which included a dispenser that wouldn't dispense. Upon my attempt to exchange said dispenser for a working model, this tasty bit of knowledge was dropped on me. The solution offered by the store manager: "Just dilute it with some water - it'll work fine."

It does, but I still feel a little cheated with my watery-soapy-goo-dispenser...

Can anybody tell me the difference between Durmot Mulroney and Dylan McDermott?
How about Taye Diggs and Tyson Beckford?
And Jon's wondering how to tell the difference between Michael Madsen and Tom Sizemore...
I'm just sayin...

I haven't plugged in my PC in over two months (in fact, it's still sitting in my trunk) - and I'm OK with that... LOVE my MacBook and my iMac...

I'm SO happy to have LOST back!

Finally, a brilliant clip from this past Saturday Night Live (the first back from the strike), and an homage to Daniel Day Lewis' Oscar winner, There Will Be Blood:

"I drink YOUR MILKSHAKE!"

Thanks for your patience... I'll be back much sooner next time!

-El Capitán