Soooooooo, one of my kickballteammates spent this past weekend up in Louisville - more specifically at Churchill Downs, celebrating the Kentucky Derby. While camped out at Turn 3, he and a friend decided it would be a great idea to go hopping along the tops of the port-o-potties, racing all the way to the bitter end. For this, we thank them - otherwise we would not have this video to enjoy:
Nice one guys... Please don't die - we need you on the field!
It takes something like this to get me back into the blogospheres...
(Let me preface this by saying that the videos below are worth EVERY second of your time - you WILL NOT laugh harder for quite some time - or at least the next 10 minutes.)
As I've blogged about before, Jimmy Kimmel and Matt Damon have had a little "feud," shall we say, going on over the years. Matt has been invited as a guest on Jimmy Kimmel Live countless times over the past few years, only to be shuffled off stage as Jimmy conveniently "runs out of time..."
So a little while back, Jimmy's girlfriend, Sarah Silverman, presented Jimmy with a music video she had produced just for him, to let him in on a little something that had been going on in her personal life. Here's that video (as sent to me by Sammy, Ariel, Heather, my mom, and several others):
"She's f*cking Matt Damon!"
Fast forward to last night... Jimmy took the opportunity of a lifetime - his cushy post-Oscar telecast - to deliver a little revenge. And as we all know from the Klingon proverb, "Revenge is a dish best served cold." Here's Jimmy's video retaliation (fucking CLASSIC!):
"He's f*cking Ben Affleck!"
Seriously - that one is like a who's-who of A-listers, right? Like a We Are The World for Gen-Y!
Before I leave you with that, I've got a few other thoughts that have come across my scattered brain lately:
Did you know that there's a difference between a Lotion Dispenser and a Soap Dispenser?
Neither did I - until I had a strange visit to Bed, Bath, and Beyond recently. Part of decorating my new house has been the accessorizing of the bathrooms. I bought a nice looking (and still masculine) set for my bathroom, which included a dispenser that wouldn't dispense. Upon my attempt to exchange said dispenser for a working model, this tasty bit of knowledge was dropped on me. The solution offered by the store manager: "Just dilute it with some water - it'll work fine."
It does, but I still feel a little cheated with my watery-soapy-goo-dispenser...
Can anybody tell me the difference between Durmot Mulroney and Dylan McDermott? How about Taye Diggs and Tyson Beckford? And Jon's wondering how to tell the difference between Michael Madsen and Tom Sizemore... I'm just sayin...
I haven't plugged in my PC in over two months (in fact, it's still sitting in my trunk) - and I'm OK with that... LOVE my MacBook and my iMac...
Finally, a brilliant clip from this past Saturday Night Live (the first back from the strike), and an homage to Daniel Day Lewis' Oscar winner, There Will Be Blood:
It's been 2,003 days (yes, seriously) since my last cigarette... Sure, I could use one (especially today), but really - who'd want to break a streak like that??
Just dropping in to tell you all that I'm still alive... A few points of interest:
Irregardless means the same thing as regardless, although the former is not generally accepted... In fact, as I type this, spellcheck is reminding me that irregardless is, in fact, NOT a word, but Webster's disagrees... Likewise - as we learned from The Simpsons - inflammable means flammable.
For Jon: If somebody does a quick mood change, they are NOT doing a "Complete 360." A "Complete 180," maybe, but never a "Complete 360." A "Complete 360" would imply that they have not only changed their mood, but returned fully to their original mood in the same fell swoop, and thus would not even be worth mentioning in the first place...
My whole childhood was a lie. First, I had to come to the realization that my mother did NOT invent this trick:
Then, just the other day, I learned that Grenadine (you know that sweet red syrup you used as a kid to make a Shirley Temple or a Roy Rogers - the one that you now use as an adult in a Tequila Sunrise and various other potent potables) is NOT Cherry flavored. What flavor is it, you ask? It's the oh-so-trendy Pomegranate, and it has ALWAYS been! LIES!!
I digress...
Last week I made my Switch complete, and purchased my SECOND Mac - an iMac (24", 2.8 GHz Core 2 Extreme!). I don't ever remember being so happy with a computer decision! Five years ago, I wouldn't be caught dead speaking those words... For reference:
Main Entry: moot Function: adjective Date: circa 1587
1: deprived of practical significance : made abstract or purely academic
Vixy.net is a web-based application that allows you to convert all Flash-based videos (i.e. YouTube, MySpace Video, etc.) into various offline usable formats (MPEG for Windows, Quicktime for Mac, mp4 for iPod or PSP, etc.). Another feature it has is the ability to just strip the audio and convert to mp3 (and we all know where that's usable).
So I was recently helping a friend on his hunt for an mp3 of the song "You're The Best," by Joe Esposito. Many of you would know this classic from The Karate Kid. As iTunes only allows this song to be purchased as part of the entire soundtrack (whole album) to The King of Kong (more on that here), I decided to get creative and look for a video with the song on YouTube (and subsequently convert it to mp3 via Vixy). In my search, I came across this gem:
Seriously - this makes me VERY nervous for the future... At least she'll be able to rely on her good looks (in a couple of years, when she's old enough to be hot, of course...)
In the interest of keeping at least a few brain cells, please enjoy the once-hot, always brilliant, Tina Fey:
For those of you who don't know, about two years ago, Michael Vick allegedly had a torrid affair with a pretty young lady, and left her with "The Herp." The best part of the story - in his dalliance, he used the pseudonym "Ron Mexico." Where do people come up with these things?!
Anyways, herpes is the least of Vick's worries, and the least of what should be inflicted upon him after his latest scandal...
Again, for those who don't know, Michael Vick is making headlines for being charged with animal cruelty and running a dogfighting ring - sending Pit Bulls and other dogs into a ring to fight to the death, amongst other forms of torture.
If you ask me, it's absolutely nauseating, and if he is found guilty, I think he should be hit with the hardest penalties possible. Horrible!
Anyways, the backlash and parodies are starting to pour in, starting with local (to me, anyways) morning show Paul & Young Ron, from Big 105.9, sending their intern/assistant producer/bitch "Oh My God" Mike out into a field with only a dog-training suit, a bunch of meat, and a Michael Vick jersey... Here's what ensued:
Oh wait - it gets better!
This is "Vick's Chew Toy."
A company has cut through small amounts of red tape and verbiage to release what is now known as "Vick's Chew Toy." Formerly known as the "Vick Chew Toy," the doggie revenge device carried too similar a likeness to his Vickness and his Atlanta Falcons jersey, and had to be remodeled... Thus, it doesn't look exactly like Ron Mexico, but it gets the point across.
Paris should be expecting hers on or after September 7... :)
So I'm watchin' Good Eats (a.k.a. my guilty pleasure) when mid-show, a local (read: "Comcast-produced") commercial comes on.
Normally I try not to pay much mind to the commercials other than the genius Starburst ads or those spots that run during the SuperBowl "Big Game," but this one in particular, for some reason, caught my ear:
Is he serious?
Does anybody else feel slightly nervous about asking this guy to help them out?
"I'll get you out of foreclosure, and in turn, I'll only take out one of your kneecaps..."
Hey Gang - Sorry for the delay... As most of you know, I was in Sin City last weekend with some of my kickballing teammates, losing all of my money (but having a KILLER time...). On top of things, I've been having trouble getting my iMix to publish through iTunes (they've finally fixed their problem). Thus, a LBC Trax was nary to be found. Here's makeup time:
As some of you know, this week brought the latest addiction: Guitar Hero II.
This game is SO much fun... Essentially, you need to hold fret buttons while strumming a strum bar on a virtual guitar - and play notes to some of our favorite songs... Really - you gotta try it... Go to Best Buy... Now!
Here's where we get to the heart of the matter... This week's LBC Trax (Vol. 5!) is dedicated to my Top 10 Favorite Songs from the XBox version of Guitar Hero II:
Here it is, kiddies... The apocalypse is upon us, and Hell has frozen over... Observe:
This pic, courtesy of Gizmodo, is actually from 2005, but Mr. Jobs and Mr. Gates will indeed reconvene - this time on stage, in a No-Holds-Barred session at the D5: All Things Digital Conference on May 30 Should be very interesting...
So I started using trig yesterday... Not a bad little site... Kristin nailed it perfectly - it's the best of MySpace (Social Networking, Music) and Digg (here, called "Trigs") combined - with a pretty sharp GUI, too...
At any rate, this morning, they made it Invite Only... I've got 100+ invitations left... Anybody wants one? You know where to find me...
